I’ve Never Fit In

And I refuse to try.

The first 30 years of my life I did try.
I didn’t really know any different.

I skipped slumber parties at 7 if it was the same night as 60 Minutes and at 6 I gave a political speech for Geraldine Ferraro — none of my friends knew who she was. As I grew older I could have cared less about High School drama and instead I spent the summers training as a professional water skier and I started a professional acting career when I was 4.
Don’t get me wrong.
I wanted to hang with the cool kids and I did — I could hang out with anybody… I like people and so I got along with the nerds, hung out with the preps, and weekended with the dreadlocked hippy group at school.
But I never really fit anywhere.
I would try.
I was extremely malleable and so I would shift and change and try to be whoever I needed to in that moment — it never really worked.

I have been overweight since I was 5.
I have been bossy since 3.
I have been the girl who does a little of everything forever.

I wasn’t fitting in. And I floundered between it bothering me deeply and total apathy.

Until I turned 32. I noticed I was a pretty good marketer. I saw ideas that some people didn’t. I had the primal urge to rage against what everybody else was saying/writing/selling and do it a little different. I like a good challenge. I like to poke people.

And it hit me — my marketing works because I don’t fit in. And now I am clear….

I won’t even try (not a little).

I will not stop cursing.
I will not behave the way you think a coach should or a marketer should or a conscious entrepreneur should.
I will not make you feel good by telling you BS.
I will not run my business off of emotional business management because women have for years.
I will not sell the way everyone else does.
I will not be feminine or masculine — heart centered or hard core marketing.
I will not do what my industry does because it looks good or is polite.

But I will be me. And I don’t fit in. And it works.

And I invite you to join me….. I don’t want you to fit in either. There is only so much room for people to fit in and that room gets too full — all the oxygen gets drained. So I’ll meet you in the hallway. I am easy to find — I’ll be the one dropping the F-bomb.